THE SAGA CONTINUES

I told yall this little girl is crazy as hell! I let her stay over her girlfriends house on Friday night. I didn't find out until Sunday that the little girl's mom caught her and my daughter walking home from a party about 11:00pm. WTF!! I talked to my daughter about 9:00pm and she said everything was fine and the little girl's mom would be home shortly. So I went about my business. Me and my cousin's and my aunts were all together getting everyone ready for my cousin's wedding. Anyway it wasn't until Sunday that I found out what happened. I was extremely pissed off that I didn't find out until 2 days later. Why wasn't I called immedietely?

I calmly sat my daughter down to talk to her.I asked her what she was thinking? I asked her why would she do something so stupid and so dangerous? She said to me." I didn't call and ask could I go because I figured you would say no, so I just went and I decided to deal with the consequences later. ( I swear to Goodness that is what she said). Before this conversation even started I did promised her that I would not put my hands on her because if I did I honestly do not know what would have happened. I played out the whole scenario in my mind....I would have grabbed her and started beating her down with great force. The more I would have thought about it the harder I would have been beating her up. Then when her body was lifeless, limp and bloody it would have jarred me back to reality, and then I would stop. But OMG!! She is barely breathing and she needs medical attention! I would have taken her to the hospital. She would have been seen immedietly and then there would have been the questions. "Ma'am what exactly happened? You did this to her? Why did you do this to her? Ma'am this is Mrs. blah-blah-blah from social services and she would like to have a word with you. The next thing I know, Dyfuss would have custody of my child. That would have been my consequences if I would have beat the shit out of her like I wanted to.

Question: Have you ever been with a man or a woman who just WILL NOT do right and you try with all your might to just work with them? You continuously give them chance after chance to do the right thing. Then one day they just do something, rather it be big or small but that is just your last straw and instead of you screaming and yelling to get your point across you just remain calm. A certain feeling of CALMNESS comes over you and you know this is your breaking point with that person.

That is how I felt with her. So instead of beating her ass and cussing her out. I went a different route. I went in her room and unplugged the cable box, unplugged the dvd player. I took out her radio. I took her Mp4 player. I called her father and informed him that he WILL NOT see her this summer. I gave him the low-down on what happened, and he was ok with my decision. She can not have phone calls and I made sure that when her friends called I informed them to not call my house until further notice. The ONLY thing she is allowed to do is leave the house for 1 hour for summer school. I drop her off and pick her up so she can't even lolligag around. She has also become Cinderella around my house. Whenever the bathroom or kitchen need to be cleaned she is the one doing it. If the floors need to be vacuumed she is the one doing it. If the dog need to be put outside or fed she is the one doing it. If the pillows on the couch need to be straightened up she is the one doing it. Basically my point is her summer is FUCKED. At least until she gets out of summer school. The last day is July 28th. Depending on how I feel after that I may or may not return her to her regularly scheduled life.

What Am I Going To Do With This Little Girl?

I looked at my daughter yesterday and realized I want to lock her up until she turns 21. Then I will let her out. No I'm not even joking. If I could actually do it I would. She is 12 and she is going to be something to fuckin' get ready for. Me and my sister always make jokes about her and how she is going to be when she grows up. We both know she is going to give me HELL!

The other day me her and my man went to the movies. She was looking so dam cute it was sickening. *side note*...I'm not one of those parents who swears they have the cutest kid in the world and the kid really isn't cute at all....Anyway she had on a cute little skirt (not too little, I don't play that shit), with a cute top that falls off the shoulders, and a pair of flip-flops. Her hair was pulled back into a clip, with a ponytail and the back part was out. She has shoulder length hair so it looked really cute. She obviously thought she looked cute because she had that swagger in her walk. (yall know what I'm talkin' bout). I wanted to just put her on punishment

Yesterday she was on her way to her grandmom's house and she came in my room to let me know she was leaving. I took one look at her and wanted to make her stay in the house. All she had on was a white T-shirt, blue jean shorts and flip-flops, with a ponytail, and that big bright beautiful smile, and she was georgeous
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OK, this is the real problem....not only is she cute with a not-so-twelve-year-old body, but she is street smart. She knows how to get the things that she wants. Se is definitely into boys because we have had a couple of incidents. Not anything major, but enough to let me know she is starting to notice them. We actually have this thing we do called "girl talk." That means she can tell me the things that are going on and she can't get into any trouble. I like doing that because it keeps our lines of communication open. It keeps me informed and lets her know that she doesn't have to be afraid to talk to me. So one day we were talking about boys that she likes. She was telling me about a little boy named Arlin. So I remember a week ago she mention another boy's name. When I asked her what happened to the first boy she had the nerve to say, "Mom, that was last week, you need to keep up with me that's over with." I could not beieve she said that. Not only that, but I also asked her if the other boy was cute. You will never guess what she said....She said "He's not really cute but he is real sweet and has personality so that goes a long way." WTF...Please keep in mind this is a 12 year old. That is some shit a grown ass woman would say.

I'm worried because I was only a year older than her when I started having sex. My mom had no idea. I was hot as a fuckin firecracker. I realized at a young age the power a woman has. I know grown woman my age who still don't know, but I was so young when I started and I only dealt with older guys. I was way to experienced before my time. That doesn't mean I was fuckin a whole lot of people. It was quality over quantity. Nonetheless I was still to young to be doing the things I was doing.

I don't want my baby girl to follow in my footsteps. As a parents we always want our kids to be better than us. To not make the mistakes that we made.

I will tell you this...I WILL NOT be oblivious to what is going on. I am way to nosey for something to be going on right under my nose and I don't know. When I came home and told my mom I was pregnant she was absolutely, positively blown away. She had no idea I was having sex. Then again maybe she knew but she wanted to be in denial about it. But I know she had no clue that I had already been sexing for 4 years before I got pregnant. She always thought my baby's daddy was my first one (yeah right).

Reality check

I work with some of the craziest people in the world. My job is like general hospital mixed with Melrose Place. It is so much drama around here. I freakin' love coming to work. Everyone is coupled up. Men and women have had affairs and left their husbands/wives and fiance's. I know it sounds crazy, but it is so true. For those who don't know, I work in a hospital. It's actually a small hospital but we have big drama. Because I'm such a nosey ass I'm ALWAYS in somebody's business. But the reason I stay out of trouble is because I'm upfront with my nosiness. I go right to the source and ask questions. I don't speculate and talk behind their backs. I wanna get the scoop from the horse's mouth.

Last night I had the pleasure of meeting a new nurse that just started a few weeks ago. She is only 26 years old and her and her man have been together 4 years. I asked her if they lived together she said no. So I started joking with her and asked her what was her secret of keeping him away because I have been with mine for 4 years also and he acts like we just have to live together. She said she stays with him sometimes but not a lot and they have talked about marriage but she's not pressed about it. Now listen, I have a tendency to just blurt things out without really thinking sometimes, but I'm always blurting out what everyone else is thinking but won't say it. So I said he must be cheating on you. Everyone looked at me like I was crazy!They couldn't believe I said that. BUT, everyone was sitting on the edge of their seats listening to our conversation and wondering what her response was going to be, because of course everyone is curious about her because she is the "new girl". So anyway one of the other nurse's asked her if she was religious. Now at first I'm thinking, what the hell does that have to do with anything? ThenI realize where she is going with this...so I asked her is she religious to the point that she is not having sex. She said yes. Ding Ding Ding Ding!! That's why they don't live together because he figures if he can't get some live in coochie why try to get her to move the hell in. But I'll bet he is screwing everything he can. I know that is horible to say but you know it is the truth. Someone tried to convince me that maybe he is also religious and he feels the same way she does. I just find that so hard to believe that a 25 year old man that lives on his own is abstaining from sex.

Earlier tonight I was having a conversation with another nurse and she is about to get married on Saturday. We were talking about love and past relationships. She was telling the story of her baby's daddy. She said she remember when she begged him not to leave her. He was already fuckin some other girl. Her son was a newborn and her parents had pretty much disowned her. She was on her own. Now here it is 7 years later and he still doesn't have anything to do with her and he is still with the same girl he left her for. Now I hate to be mean BUT, the whole time she is telling the story all I could think is....She was the only white girl he had been with and he probably never took her seriously and he wasn't going to loose his family over her. So while she was loving him and being defiant to her parents, because they were racist in the first place( that's not an observation, she actually told me that) . He already was planning his escape. He left her for a black girl and has probably never had another white girl again and probably never will.

Now I don't want to offend anyone but I know a lot of black guys who say he would definitely sleep with a white girl, but he would not bring her home to his mother. I don't really agree with that because I feel like if you can't bring her home, don't even sleep with her.

UNTITLED

I had so much I wanted to write about now of course nothing comes to mind. EXCEPT....

Last Friday I took my daughter shopping. Nothing major, just a couple pairs of shorts and shirts to match. Then on Saturday I was at the shoe store and I brought her a pair of the cutest flip flops. When I got home later that night I finally picked up the mail. It had been sitting there for 2 days. The first thing I noticed was a letter from my daughter's school. I opened it and it was a notice that she has to attend SUMMER SCHOOL. Not only that, but because she goes to Catholic school I have to pay $40 a week for each class she has to take. What type of shit is that! Luckily she only has 1 class, Language. How the hell is she failing Language? What the hell do you have to do in Language? Anyway needless to say I was beyond pissed because I just went out and spent my hard earned money on her black ass. So I called her girlfriend's cell phone and told her to get home. When she got there I proceded to black out on her ass. I always freak out when she is fucking up in school. So I told her that she can't walk around with new clothes on and her hair all done up all the time thinking she is cute if she really is stupid. She had the nerve to say "why I gotta be stupid"?!?! And she said this as she was walking out of my room and sucking her teeth.

OMG!! I somersulted (did I spell that right) over the bed. I almost got clipped by the ceiling fan. I ran into her room grabbed her by her hair (that's my favorite move since she loves her hair so much), slammed her up against the wall and quickly and painfully beat her the fuck up.

I stepped back calmed myself and went back into my room to get dressed so I could go out.

Monday night me and my man decided to go down Atlantic City so we could do a little gambling. It seems like we did a little gambling and a lot of drinking. Free drinks are a beautiful thing. The funny thing is we swore we was hard core gambling on the dam penny and nickel machine. You should have seen us getting tipsy as hell and chillin' with the old folx, because you know those are the only people that play the dam penny machine. We had so much fun. I lost his money and mine. I know everytime I talk about him I say the same thing, but I'm gonna say it again...I love that negro!

Remember that dude D I was dealing with a few months ago? He called me while I was down AC. I answered the phone. He asked where I was and I told him where I was and who I was with. I can't help it but I love rubbing it in his face that me and my Boo are still together doing our dam thing, because he tried to hate on my baby. That's why I had to leave his ass alone because he couldn't just sit back and play his position. I hate when a dude is acting like a you-know-what!

NO ELECTRICITY...OH HELL NO!!

Yesterday I woke up and my electricity was OFF. I was pissed as hell. Me and my man was almost stuck together from sweat. It was 95 dam degrees outside and there was no fan or air or anything on. I tried so hard to remain calm, but because I can not and will not hold my tongue I had to black out on him. I told him that he knew he should have been paying the freaking bill and the shit was now high as hell. I told him I didn't give a dam about the money he gave to his mother or his sister. I don't care nothing about who the hell he had to help out with some money for whatever the hell they needed. I told him he eats, sleeps and shits here so he needs to take care of my freakin' house first. I went on and on for a good 20 minutes.

I finally shut up and got dressed and left. When I came home he called and asked me of I had $300.00. Of course I had it. He said he had the other $1300.00 Yeah that's right the freakin bill was $1600.00. Now my entire bill is paid off. I am down to a zero balance. So of course my central air has been running non-stop. Now when I wake up I have no idea how hot it is outside because it is about 70 comfortable degrees in my house.

I really aprreciated what he did but I really expected nothing less. I don't mind acknowledging when he really comes thru for me but I also can't praise him to much, because them he tries to get lazy. I always let him know that even once you conquer one thing there is always something else waiting in the wings that needs to be taken care of.