What type of IDIOT am I??

The other day my sister came to my house. When she got there she asked me where was our cousin Tracie (she lives right down the street from me). I said I didn't know so she told me that she just drove past her house and Tracie's fiance's ex-wife (stay with me) came to the door and peeked outside(her fiance lives next door to her). I told you to stay with me. So basically my cousin and her fiance live next door to each other. Anyway I immedietly called Tracie on her cell phone. She answered the phone all chipper and asked me if I wanted anything while she was out. I told her to just get home because her fiance had company. I told her who it was and she said she would be right there.

Meanwhile my sister was outside with our little cousin (Tracie's daughter) and they were putting anti-freeze in my sister's car. So I decided to check my oil and make sure I had enough in my car. Needless to say I did need oil and of course I keep some in the trunk of my car because my car is all jacked the hell up. So by this time Tracie is pulling up with all her step kids in the car(she had just picked them up from school). So she goes in the house and we were all standing outside just waiting to see if some drama was about to pop off. So after a few minutes my sister decided we should all go in the house and be nosy, and of course start talking about the wedding just to piss off the ex-wife. So I quickly close the hood of my car (I almost slammed my cordless phone under the hood because I'm too busy being nosy and not watching what I was doing) So we all bum-rush the spot and after a while I guess she gets the hint and she goes outside and sits on the step(eventhough I think she should have left,she really should not have been there in the first place since my cousin wasn't there).

Later on I was on my way to work and I noticed that my car was a little smokey, but no big deal. Then as the ride got longer and longer the smoke started getting thicker and thicker. So I finally get about a block from my job and I'm sitting at this long ass light. At this point the smoke is bellowing out from under the hood. Now I'm still sitting at this long ass light and I'm thinking OMG what did I leave under the hood! There has to be something sitting on top off the engine burning the hell up! While all this is going thru my mind you wouldn't be able to tell because I am sitting there just bopping my head to the music like nothing is going on(actually it was a commercial). I refused to look around at any of the other cars, because I didn't want to catch eye contact with anyone so that they could point to my car and roll down their window to tell me that my dam car looks like it is on fuckin' fire(I can see that for myself).

The light finally changes and I'm on my way into the parking lot of my job. I park and get out so I can look under the hood to see what the hell the problem is. I lifted my hood and can you guess what I did....I never put the oil cap back on. So therefore the oil had bubbled up and spilled all over the place. But the funny part is that the gas cap was still sitting right there. I think it was probably melted onto the engine. I was like WTF!!

When I got in the building people were asking me if I was ok because they seen my car smoking. One girl even said she seen me about to go under the hood and she thought something was going to blow up in my face. But she sure didn't come no where close to me. I guess she figured that if I was going to blow up I was going to blow up by my dam self.

I smelled like I was on fire by the time I got to work.......I called my sister and of course she was all over the floor laughing at me....That's just some of the airhead shit that I do....just wanted to share that with yall.